Ladies' Night
by Pakmai
Summary: When two women get together for a Ladies' Night at home, they decide their singleness has gone on long enough! Loading up the hottest new online dating site they find some very interesting characters who seem to be looking for love just like they are. But filling out a profile is not always as easy as it seems. Multi-Fandom, One-shot. Characters: Spoilers.


**Ok, I am not sure exactly where this idea came from, but it made me giggle the more I did think about it. I hope everyone gets the references to the particular characters, I didn't name them all necessarily, but there are quite a few. I hope you all enjoy it!**

 **I do not own any of the male characters from their various themes, though Liz and Catie are my creations. :) This is just intended for a spot of fun!**

 **Reviews/Comments welcome!**

* * *

It had been a long week and a long month, so I had been convinced by my best friend Catie, that it was past time for a girl's night. Neither of us felt like cleaning up enough to go out though so we decided to order a pizza, get some wine, and watch cheesy movies with hunky men. A little cliche, perhaps, but I at least had not had a date in the past month, possibly two, and I know that even the outgoing Catie was running dry in that department lately.

"Oh! Liz, I almost forgot!" Catie sat up suddenly from where she had been lounging back against my couch, a glass of wine in her hand. "I have the perfect answer for our boyfriend woes." She had this look on her elfin face that made me think of pure trouble. This would not end well.

"Ugh. Do I even want to know?" I asked as I looked at my friend, who had an effortless beauty and outgoing personality. It was the reason we were friends. We didn't have a huge amount in common, but we had enough, and her boisterous behavior compensated well for my more introverted personality. Though it was easy to become more of an extrovert with Catie to take some of the pressure off.

"Yes, you want to know, it is the best idea ever." Despite her slightly valley-girl way of talking, Catie had been in the top 10% of her class in college. And now she was getting up and bringing back my laptop to put it on the coffee table.

I groaned because before I knew it, she had brought up what was unmistakably an online dating site. "You are kidding me." Sliding down to side beside her, I counted her lucky that I had more than one glass of wine in my system, otherwise I would have shut her down rather definitively. "There are not going to be any decent guys on that site. The only guys who use sites like that are ones that are damaged or weird in some way." I did not want to get into dating online, because you never knew if what they said was the truth or if they were who they said they were and not some sort of ax murderer.

But there was no stopping Catie, she had already created a user name and started to fill out the online quiz. "It's not serious, Liz. Just for fun, promise! But you have to create a profile if you want to see any of the guys." She says in a casual way as her fingers tapped across the keyboard.

It was only after she loaded up a picture to the profile that I noticed she was using all of my information, not hers. "Hold on just a minute there, missy! Use your own information, don't pimp me out!" I objected, reaching out to try and reclaim my laptop, but I was too late, she had already hit the 'submit' button, and the screen was saying welcome to the site! Dropping my head a little, groaned, before brushing back stray strands of my hair that escaped my ponytail. At least she had used a good picture. "Fine. Fine, lets just see what guys are on this site." Putting my wine aside after taking a large drink, I leaned forward to navigate to the area that boasted new profiles.

Catie beamed as I gave in, and she sipped her wine before leaning forward as well. "Oh, how about that one?" She pointed to one which I then clicked on. "Oh, he's cute.."

"Kind of.. if he got rid of those dorky glasses.. his eyes are gorgeous, though... What's with the weird scar on his forehead, though? Looks sort of like a Z.. wonder how that happened.." I muse as I tilt my head to look at it, then scroll down to see more of his profile and let out a whistle. "Uh, no way. He's barely 18!" I shook my head firmly and went back in the browser to try and spot another one.

Catie pouted a little but even she had to agree that 18 was a touch too young for either of us. "Well, what about this one, then? Castiel. He's definitely hot. But so serious..." She made a mock serious face, then started giggling as she brushed my hands aside to bring up the profile.

Even I giggled, which meant that I was definitely tipsy. Shaking my head, I leaned forward to read the profile, "Wait.. his job says 'Angel of the Lord'.." I couldn't help but snicker a little. "He is a total nutball! I told you, everyone on here was insane or damaged.."

"I wouldn't mind him being MY guardian angel." Catie said before joining in the giggling. "Can we just keep his picture? I wouldn't mind drooling over it on lonely nights."

I laughed harder at the image of Catie drooling over anyone. "No! Catie, absolutely not!" Quickly, I hit the button to bring us back to the main page, trying to find our place since the profiles were rearranged to put newer ones at the top, but I ignored them as well to go down to where we were. Finally I brought up one just to get a closer look at the picture.

"He's OLD." Catie complained, leaning forward a little. "Likes Redheads.." She reads off the screen. "Enjoys potions.. what is he, some new age hippie? Look at his picture, Liz. Look at it." She insists, pointing at it emphatically.

I did look at the picture, and wrinkled my nose a little. "You're right, he looks greasy... and weird. And creepy. Maybe I need glasses, I didn't see his picture so well from the last page... but you're right, he's like 40 or something. Just going from one extreme to the other." I giggled, shaking my head for a few moments before I went back to the main page.

We argued about the merits of a few more before we both stared at one picture, practically drooling. "Ok, I do not like long hair on men normally, but he is... hot." I said a little breathlessly as I looked at the guy. "Holy moly, Catie. He's 6' 4"! That means he is.. wow.. I just want to see that man shirtless." I said with a slightly drunken giggle, realizing that I had finished the wine in my glass. "Go down, go down! Lets see what the rest of the profile is." I said eagerly, as much as I did not want to scroll away from his picture.

Like the good friend she is, Catie obliged though, scrolling down. "He says his job is a hunter. He's probably one of those people who lead bored husbands through the forest so they can shoot at bambi." She says with a small pout, then she giggled. "I wouldn't mind dragging him into the forest, though..." She said with a suggestive waggle of her eyebrows.

Laughing, I gave her shoulder a shove before I giggled a little. "He doesn't list a hometown or anything, though. Sounds like a bit of a drifter.. I don't know, that sounds a little sketchy to me, and he says he is very interested in the paranormal. That just sounds too weird.." I admitted, before scrolling back up and letting out a dreamy sigh. "Why does he have to be so hot?" I whined a little, groaning before I forced myself to go back. Even so, maybe when I was on my own I would send him a message. Not that I realistically thought I would once I sobered up.

While I was musing on those possibilities, Catie had already moved onto the next candidate. "Ok.. hot. He says he's in law enforcement.. kind of. How can you be kind of in law enforcement?" She asked me in confusion.

We kept reading down and I nodded along with it. "He's hot, but look at this.. he put 'timeless' under his age, and 'omnisexual' under what gender is he looking for.. what does that even mean?"

"Eww... maybe he likes to do it with animals or something.." Catie said with a wrinkle of her nose, then she scrolled up to the top, looking at the picture again. "Oh, no. No way. Maybe he just means bisexual.." She says slowly before looking at me.

"Gay." We decide in unison, before falling into a giggling fit. She recovers before I do, and I put my hands over my mouth. "Still.. Captain Jack sounds sort of like a stripper name."

Catie glances sideways at me before she grins. "And how would you know?" She asks playfully, ducking the smack that I aim in her direction, before she giggles again. "Fine, you look.. I'm going to get more wine." She decided imperiously. "And maybe ice cream." She adds after she gets up, glancing at me before she heads toward my kitchen.

It was easy to see that there were a ridiculous number of really hot guys on this site, but there was something off with all of them, something that made me uneasy and not willing to take the risk. The next one I brought up, I decided to yell the details to Catie who was still in the kitchen. "Oh, you have to see this one, Catie.. the cheekbones on him, and he has almost black hair, all curly along the edges, and the most gorgeous eyes I have ever seen. Blue, or green.. or some combination of them. He is 30, 6 feet tall, looking for a girl who is not an idiot and will not complain about... scientific experiments..." I talked more slowly as I read it off the screen, more and more confused.

Catie came back with wine and a pint of ice cream with two spoons sticking out of the top. Plopping back down beside me, she let out a whistle. "He is hot. But look at this, he said his job is Consulting Detective.. what is that even? I bet it's just something he made up to cover the fact he's unemployed." She decides, jabbing her spoon at my screen before she digs into the ice cream.

As much as she was a killjoy for my choice, I had to admit that she was right. I hadn't heard about a job like that either, and guys would make up all sorts of excuses to cover any deficiencies like unemployment. "He probably just wants a rich girlfriend and to support his experiments. So weird." I sighed, this was starting to get a little depressing, so I plucked the second spoon from the ice cream and dug into it as well. "Fine, you choose." I decided, leaning back against the couch.

"You can be such a diva." Catie teased with another giggle before she looked at the list, spoon dangling out of her mouth. "What about this one?" She asked after removing the spoon from her mouth. "He's good looking, maybe a bit older than we are, but he's a doctor, former military, looking to settle down.." She listed things off as she went down the list.

I leaned forward as I looked at it, then sighed. "Two big problems, Catie." I pointed at the screen. "He is too short, and he's British. I'm ok with long distance, but that is a little much. Besides, there's like a 5 hour time difference, we would never get to talk or anything, not on the phone or anything, it would all have to be email. No, that doesn't work." I shook my head a little, then giggled. "Besides, his eyes would be at my throat or neck or something embarrassing like that." I giggled at the thought, shaking my head again and spearing the spoon into the ice cream again.

"He would work fine for me.. not all of us can be Amazons." Catie pointed out around a mouthful of the ice cream before she returned to her perusal of the website.

"I am 5' 10"! That is hardly Amazonian height." I reminded her before I, too, leaned forward to look at the site. "Oh, how about that one? I mean, he looks like he might be about five or ten years older than us, I suppose, but he looks pretty normal.. Phil. How much more mundane of a name can you get?" I pointed out as I urged Catie to look at his profile.

Catie obliged and clicked. "We really need to set an age limit for ourselves.. hang on.. on almost every question here, he puts Classified. That is not a good thing. He is a collector of baseball cards, and works with a Shield. Or at a Shield? I don't get it." She points out as she frowns a little at the computer, grumbling and exiting out before she ohhs. "This one. This one! He is gorgeous.. he's over 6 feet tall, a totally muscle bound hunk.. says he's former military, served overseas.. there's no age given. He likes baseball, he is not very good with pop culture.. Oh my god, he says his idea date would be dinner and taking a girl to a movie, and that he is old fashioned." She makes an 'aww' noise. "He's perfect for you!"

I have to snicker a little at the comment about age, shaking my head at the question about the Shield, not having any more idea about it than she does. "He is really, really hot." I agree as I nearly drool over the picture, eating another bite of ice cream to cool me down before I read the rest of it. "He would be perfect for me if it was a real profile. This seems too much like a scammer, like someone wrote down everything a girl might want to hear, and put some model's picture with it." It was too good to be true, and in my experience, things that feel that way usually are too good to be true. Still, I allowed myself a brief fantasy of what it might be like to be on that man's arm, which was only more depressing. "I need more wine, I am not tipsy enough anymore to go through this." I decided, reaching for the bottle Catie brought back before pouring myself another generous glass full and drinking quietly.

"Hm. That's true. I didn't think about that. I mean, that it could be a fake. But guys like that probably exist somewhere, right?" Catie asks before she sighs and reluctantly moves on, even if I see that she puts a 'favorite' tag on that one for later.

"Look, that guy didn't even fill out his profile, and there's no picture.. Michael Weston.. I wonder if he changed his mind or something when he was halfway through it." I wondered out loud as I pointed to the blank icon where the picture which was uploaded should have been. "I didn't know it would let you submit without a picture.. maybe it was removed afterwards, like it was inappropriate or something."I muse, giggling a little at the thought.

Catie just makes a small sound to acknowledge what I was saying before she scrolls on, obviously looking for something else or wanting to find something. "Odd name, but what about this one? John Smith. Sharp suit, he's a little bit foxy.." She says playfully before she loads up the profile.

I get up, going to put the ice cream away before it completely melts. "Alright, so give me the details. " I yell back into the living room, stumbling as I go and giggling a little about it. Maybe I was still more tipsy than I thought.

"Alright.. he doesn't have an age listed, but I doubt he's over 40. Says he likes to exercise, running mostly. Would love someone to go on an adventure with him, must be open minded. He likes history but he likes science fiction, too." Catie yells back the details to me. "He sounds perfect, lets send him your profile! Look, it even says he's a Doctor. Though he might want to proof read this a bit more, he put a 'The' in front of his job title, like he is the only Doctor in existence." She says with a little laugh.

I can't help but laugh when I come back into the room. "No, no sending my profile to anyone! Come on, lets watch a movie or something, I'm bored with this website.. it's no fun looking at hot guys who are damaged and I will never have a chance with in any case." I point out, pouting a little as I sit down, then reaching out to snap the laptop shut before Catie can argue. "Movie, now. We have a ton of them, pick one and play." I order as I lean back with my glass of wine.

While Catie pouts for a moment, she dramatically rolls her eyes before she giggles a little. "Alright.. there is one.. the one with the dancing guys who are all really hot.." She says before she finds it and loads it up, grinning widely. "More hot guys we can't have, but at least these we can enjoy a bit more." She winks at me before she leans back so we can continue our Ladies' night.


End file.
